73. Properly Communicating Criticism, Discontent, Anger

People in general, but children in particular, should be taught how to communicate criticism, discontent, anger, and other such feelings using polite, well-mannered ways and with a constructive spirit and when appropriate. Conversely, people should be taught to not be so easily offended when others criticize them or express some displeasure with what they do or say. People should even encourage others to convey constructive criticisms of themselves.

People should be taught to give others the benefit of the doubt. In other words, people should tend to assume that the offending party is going through a bad set of circumstances, the stress of which may have given rise to the offending behavior. People should be taught to not be offended by the vague, unclear, or unspecified actions of other people, and that they should not retaliate in any way to suspect or questionable behaviors made towards them by other people unless they are certain of valid reasons for such offensive behavior. Many times people with poor communication skills or even those with good communication skills but having a bad day, often don’t get their points across in the best possible way and may choose words that may be taken as an offense to listeners. People should be taught to assume that people who seem to be offensive at times, or all the time, usually have hidden or underlying frustrations, problems in their personal lives, medical problems or whatever else may be the case. Especially during times of crises, emergencies or other high-stress events, people should exhibit much more tolerance towards these types of behaviors.

People should be taught to ask for and seek true forgiveness much more readily from those whom they have wronged.

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